Hm…nude Will Graham, you say? CGI? Let’s take a look…
Behold: An Almost Lunar Eclipse
(Get it? Get it? Because the moon…and there’s a butt…like…two moons? Eh? Yeah, alright… *sigh*)
When my eyes first soaked up the glory of Will Graham’s blood-covered ass in S3E9 (And the Woman Clothed With the Sun…), I must say, I was quite pleased. If my heart started beating a little faster and something began stirring in my loins, that’s my own business, thank you very much.
I mean, look at this image. Even if someone has absolutely no sexually-charged interest regarding the man in the foreground, there’s still plenty here to appreciate. Strong lines, multiple layers of depth, haunting ambiance, the contrast between the glowing moon and the inky architectural structure– what’s not to love? It almost looks like a painting, carefully composed and well thought-out. Could it be that this image isn’t all…real?
There has absolutely been some retouching here– probably upping the luminosity in some places, darkening the values in others– but does this extend to Hugh Dancy’s figure in the foreground?
I don’t believe so.
As somebody with a lot of time on their hands, I’ve been able to make my way through plenty of Hugh Dancy movies. Ella Enchanted, Hysteria, Martha Marcy May Marlene; he has quite the filmography, to be sure. Unfortunately, though, I know of only one film that showcases his backside unhindered by clothing: Tempo. It’s rather obscure, and I can’t say I particularly enjoyed the storyline, but lo and behold:
Yes, that is Hugh Dancy, showering with the door open and probably getting water all over the floor. My concerns about his safety while walking across wet tile floor aside, this image is very helpful in deducing whether his butt was retouched or not.
If you zoom in and compare the images…
…you’ll notice that the lighting/resolution is absolutely horrible. I’ve highlighted what I believe is the most prominent curve of each image.
If you compare the curves themselves…
…they look very similar to me.
Given that Hannibal was filmed in 2014/2015 and Tempo came out in 2003, this is rather impressive. 12 years of maintaining the same general butt shape? Witchcraft, most likely. We’ll measure him against a duck later to see if we need to burn him or not…
So, as far as I can tell, that is 100% Certified Hugh Dancy’s Butt. I can’t help butt wonder, though– have we truly gotten to the bottom of this mystery? Can we truly put this all behind us? If tush comes to shove, I guess I can conduct some more research…
TL;DR: Have you ever seen dat ass in the moonlight? It appears quite unreal… Except it probably is real, and Hugh Dancy probably suffered big time being naked at night in Canada in the middle of winter. He’s the true MVP.
A Madness Between Two 